Towers of Suffering

Donald stood outside his new, big-beautiful tower, one last time, took a deep breath and puffed up his chest with pride.

Eighty floors of the most modern and technologically superior construction anywhere in the world. For over two years, he invested all the company funds, his energy, and his time focusing only on this project.

Soon, banks, technology companies, and other corporates will occupy it’s large floors, and the wide corridors will be filled with the top paid employees.

Just one last form to sign at the bank and starting tomorrow deliveries will begin to customers in earnest.

This was no ordinary project, it was estimated to return over 15 times his original investment. Making him a billionaire a month from today.

Within the next hour, he steps out of a large bank, smiling contentedly, and drives off. As soon as he reaches the nearest intersection leading out of the city, a truck driving in full speed rams his car on the side. Donald’s car spins and topples simultaneously for over twenty meters and comes to a halt with smoke billowing from the engine.

Two days later, doctors declare that Donald has lost all his memory and will never be the same.

*****

Let’s pause here and come back to Donald and his big beautiful later. For now let me drive your attention towards human suffering.

Suffering is not something new for life on this planet. Not only the poor, not only the weak, not only the illiterate — everyone suffers. Humans suffer their health, money, relationships, and every damn thing under the sun, but what if I tell you that suffering is pointless and it is a choice that we control.

Let me be clear — pain is real, but suffering is a choice. Suffering is a state of the mind, but pain is inevitable. Donald is likely to endure pain for many months to come, which the doctors can ease with pain killers. But since he lost his memory, he will not remember the tower he built, he will not remember the money he owes the bank, he will not remember the commitment he made to his customers, he will not remember the love he lost or the date he missed.

Losing ones memory is not a great thing but the point is, he is not suffering the endless other things that most of us suffer. Does that mean people have to go about losing their memory? No. It only proves that if we choose to let go we can exist without suffering.

When the end of suffering is just a simple memory loss away (metaphorically), or a simple tilt of fortunes, then why do people spend hours and days building towers of suffering in their minds? Yes, people build and relish their towers of suffering. As if it is a birth right, and there are whole industries that help people build more, especially ideologies that glorify suffering.

At least Donald will make money out of his tower in the next few months and will be rich, but time spent building towers of suffering in the head is of no use even to the self.

A tower of suffering has no value. At the most, someone might show pity and help you, but the burden of the tower is still yours to carry.

Believe me, a tower of suffering has no value. At the most, someone might show pity and help you, but the burden of the tower is still yours to carry. It occupies unnecessary space in our minds, and hearts. Space which could do better if allocated for love, joy and other beautiful things life has to offer.

*****

Research has uncovered that chronic rumination or prolonged time and energy invested in suffering can lead to Gray matter atrophy in our brains; shrinkage of the hippocampus; a suppressed immune system; and a sense of hopelessness. Since this is not an article on science let me stop here, but I’ve included some research references at the end if you are interested in further exploration.

The point to remember is building or investing in a tower of suffering is leading no one nowhere. Infact it causes more harm than good to the self.

The towers we build within are the foundations upon which we march in life.

There are methods to overcome this, but the most simple of all is to instruct the mind to remind us whenever we are experiencing suffering. The mind always does, and it becomes our cue to not go about building that tower of suffering. In that moment, consciously choose to do something else, play with your pet, dance with your child, watch the birds fly, pray to your god, go swimming, do the laundry. Anything that keeps your mind occupied, other than chronic rumination.

The towers we build within are the foundations upon which we march in life. If we build the wrong towers, they will bring us down no matter how hard we try.

Donald chose to build towers that will bring him fortune, choose yours wisely. Love, joy, learning, exercising, offering help, praying, meditating, are all great towers to build, these can create a positive feedback loop within oneself. Think about it.

*****

To reiterate, as Sadhguru says, “You do not have a choice about being in physical pain, but you can always choose not to suffer.” In another quote he says, “Causing suffering to yourself is like causing suffering to a helpless child. You cannot fight or run from yourself — you are completely defenseless.” Both are powerful lessons to each one of us.

The choice is ours, when life throws lemons, make lemonade; when adversaries throw dung, make manure. Once you realize that languishing in suffering is pointless and worthless, you begin to take charge of your time and energy, and then life shifts.

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“Have you built towers of suffering in your life? Did it help you or drag you? I’d like to hear your thoughts. Stay connected for more insights and stories by following me on Instagram and Facebook.”